Monday, March 20, 2006

St. Patrick's Day Massacre

After returning from five days in sunny San Juan I was greeted by both the harsh cold of winter in New York AND a seriously devastating population fact:

the population of Ireland is 4,015,676.

I realize that not everyone is as into population facts as me, but let me try and put this in perspective.

-The population of the USA (!) is 295,734,134

-The population of New York City is 8,168,338

-The population of the UK is 60,441,457

-The population of London is 7.5 million

-The population of Italy is 58,103,033

-The population of Finland is 5,223,442

-The population of Luxembourg is 468,571

This seriously blows my mind. I've tried to convey this mind-blowingness to other people, but NO ONE'S FEELING MY VIBE. Can you believe that Ireland is closer in size to Luxembourg (both in real terms and proportionally) than to the UK?

I have a bad tendency to equate population size with coolness and I have a serious soft spot for Ireland and its peoplez so this is NOT adding up for me. When the Wes Man and I realized that Columbus, Ohio had a bigger population than Boston we started planning imaginary road trips there.

The population of Puerto Rico is 3,916,632. The area of that island is 9,104 sq km.

Ireland has almost the same population but its area is 70,280 sq km.

I know there must be tons of good reasons (potato famine, this etc.) why Ireland has such a WEAK population, but STILL!

If anyone out there is as surprised by this as I am, CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT IT?
Maybe I should try to go here.

There were 1/4 as many people at the NY St. Patrick's Day parade as there are ON THE WHOLE ISLAND OF EIRE (1/6 if you count Northern Ireland).



All you AMERICA-HATERS better write George W. an apology letter because on his recent trip to INDIA he finagled a SWEET DEAL which is gonna give us DELICIOUS INDIAN MANGOS at our supermarkets. I'm not sure what India got in return. Maybe some uranium hot dogs or something...

This is from a transcript of Bush and Singh's press conference:

PRESIDENT BUSH: And, oh, by the way, Mr. Prime Minister, the United States is looking forward to eating Indian mangos. Part of liberalizing trade is to open up markets. And as a result of your leadership, and our hard work, we are opening up markets.

You know Bush doesn't actually like mangos. He only eats BBQ. He's trying to make peace with all the blue-state food snobs.

Peeps with TIMES SELECT can learn more here.

Also props to Alec for putting out some positive vibes over on prosebeforehos.


Blogger jawsh said...

1:16 AM  
Anonymous E. Nigma said...

Can you spot the difference between the two photos up top?!?!


stevey c.c.

1:39 AM  
Anonymous alec said...

That can't be a real press release -- can it??

BBQ World??

1:33 PM  
Blogger Ezra said...

that link is HI-LARIOUS. do you think he knows the reporter he keeps calling "Stretch"?

"Edward Nigma. E. Nigma. What's an enigma? It's like a riddle. RIDDLER!"
-Batman Forever

2:55 PM  
Anonymous alec said...

This is reminiscint of a Homer and Grimes conversation in the Simpsons:

Homer: [to Grimes, who's walking by] Hiya Stretch, what's the good word?
Grimes: My name is "Grimes," uh, Simpson, Frank Grimes. I took the trouble to learn your name, so the least you could do is learn mine.
Homer: Okay, Grimey.

Also, good work on ribs link, but how can I credit you if you are uncreditable (you are but a fierce imaginary image as the time stands).

Thanks for the 'eProps' by the way. Is this cyclical nature?


10:45 PM  
Anonymous Joey Snok said...

Ezra I didn't know you went to PR! did you eat any mofongos? if not why did you go?

be easy.

12:29 AM  
Blogger Ezra said...

joey, MOFONGOS were a major theme of our trip. i ate a mofongo stuffed with various kinds of seafood one night. it was out of control.

1:16 PM  
Anonymous a (crater) lake said...

good eye u bufued mofongo!

(in da second pic u can clearly see ezra's ballz gettiing some air)

6:29 PM  
Blogger Shashank said...

Hilariously enough this was part of a nuclear deal. But Indian mangoes are definitely worth it. I am not biased in any way.

9:50 PM  
Blogger Bobby said...

Come play Ireland if you love us so much!

Plz! :)

5:10 AM  
Anonymous Wow Gold said...

fantastic blog.

10:20 AM  
Anonymous Wow Gold said...

what a blog ! .

10:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I remember listening to Keith Farnan do a joke (not a very funny one mind you) about the number of people in the US who claim to be Irish. Apparently 55 million Americans claim to be Irish, while Ireland only sent us about 3 million. I think people just like the idea of being stereotypically Irish (drunk, ginger and freckled come to mind...well, maybe just drunk).

Ireland is the shit though, any culture that gives its statues/monuments awesome (and perhaps slightly inappropriate) nicknames is bang on in my book (see The Stiffy at the Liffey).

Do I know that no one reads this? Yes. Do I care? Not particularly.

4:46 PM  
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